From time to time Gogle looks not so much like a search engine – a lifeless tool meant to process users’ queries, – but more like a Terpsichore whose movements make people hold their breath and watch her with awe. Actually, Google has performed its enchanting/inconceivable/troublesome (odd ones out) dance since 2000, but each time it’s something matchless and unpredictable, regarding both the date of upgrade and the results.

Such intriguing issues as technical background, Matt Cutts’ explanations, notorious updates like Jagger and PageRank jumping have been already studied inside out on the Web, so, let’s keep aside mere words and concentrate on another topic: each user knows that dancing is Google’s nature, but has anybody ever wondered what dance does it perform exactly?

Looking through the related forums I classified people’s opinions according to the list of dance style categories.

So, this time Mr G., the honored artist of the World Wide Web scene may be dancing:

• seductive tango. Many webmasters are quite amazed with the results of January update, as after the Google Dance their PageRank got a noble deep-green color, and their ranking looks more tempting:

“One of my blogs had been PR2 for the past 3 years – now it’s up to 5! I feel good, ta-da-dam…”

• well-ordered minuet. Strange enough, but despite all Google’s delays (e.g. in October 2007, as well as October 2005, when PageRank hadn’t been updated for six months or so), some website owners still believe in the systematic character of Google’s movements:

“Google is updating regularly – up and down. From inside sources I’ve learned that the next changes would be made April 14th 2008.” Oops.. Seems like they were wrong?..

• chaotic rave. Meanwhile, lots of users don’t see any order in what Google makes on the scene, considering its behavior as strange and intended to mess the minds of webmasters:

“Hey folks, something truly weird is happening with Google. Yesterday my PR went from 0 to 2 – I did expect it because of my links – but several hours later I checked it and saw PR0 again… Anybody knows what’s the hell goin’ on?”

• rapid and breathtaking jig. All spectators are shocked with the crazy rhythm Google has chosen for its performance. Actually, most people don’t like the “mezzo allegro” tempo, giving the preference to “moderato” and “dolce”:

“The current update has come too soon, but you never know what to expect from Google.”

• meaningless chicken dance. While some webmasters are getting mad about the color of their PR bar, others reject the very idea of its importance, treating the update philosophically:

“Really people, PageRank doesn’t matter in SEO, so don’t be worried about it. Just focus on your SEO.”

• other versions. Do you know other dances Google is good at?

Image by Petra

If you aren’t a complete newb on the Web, you must know that nothing ever happens without Google. If Microsoft bid for Yahoo on Friday, Google couldn’t help commenting the deal on its official blog on Sunday. To believe David Drummond, Google’s chief legal officer, this bid can’t be called other than “hostile” and raising “troubling question”, while Google itself remains warm and fuzzy, focusing on “interests of Internet users” and “openness, choice and innovation”.

 

What most news directories say: The current deal between Microsoft and Yahoo has been negotiated for 18 months and resulted in an unsolicited offer of $31 a share ($44.6 billion total). According to Microsoft authorities, this bid represents a premium for shareholders, yet Yahoo is putting off the decision, aspiring to jack up the price. As for the software titan, Microsoft is going to borrow money – for the first time in its history! – to fund the acquisition. Meanwhile Google does its best to spoil the deal.

 

What people think: Now this news is widely discussed throughout the Web. Some people believe in Microsoft + Yahoo marriage, others bet that Google won’t tolerate their merging. I decided to place the most common/interesting opinions here:

 

“Paying so much bucks for Yahoo is sheer folly! Microsoft will have to wait at least 100 years to surpass this investment. On its place I wouldn’t.”

 

Well, Yahoo’s market positions aren’t so sweet as in 2000, when the company saw its stock peak, charging $100 per share (compared with its current price of $29). However, Microsoft analysts are convinced that the merging with Yahoo will generate $1 billion yearly. True or not, anyways Microsoft revenue will be growing next year: to believe Reuters Estimates, it must increase by 10% on average.

 

“Google is afraid.”

 

And if your two competitors unite to smash your business, wouldn’t you be? Actually Google becomes very active when it is frightened: thus, its CEO Eric Schmidt offered Yahoo CEO Jerry Yang support while resisting Microsoft’s take-over attempt (according to business dictionary, this means: “offered A LOT OF cash”).

 

“As we all know Google lives to annoy Microsoft”

 

Here I could second Larry Dignan: Microsoft and Google may look like implacable enemies – just remember that incident with DoubleClick acquisition. However, from time to time I wonder if someone knows that Microsoft’s founder Bill Gates contributed to Google development by investing $6 million in Stanford Computer Science Center which became the cradle for PageRank and which, by the way, still owns the rights for the unique algorithm.

 

“I know why Google is planning to bid for Yahoo: it wants to monopolize the Web!”

 

I think the word “monopoly” is often misunderstood. According to Webster’s Dictionary it refers to “exclusive control or possession of something”. Today Google has 62% of the worldwide Internet search market, and if it merges with Yahoo, this number may grow up to 75%, which is still far from 100%.

 

What is your opinion? Really guys, what do you think of Microyah-Yahoogle future trends?

Image by ? Sigalakos